Friday, June 24, 2011

Going cold turkey

About a month ago, I figured out what everyone else already knew - that online shopping is the shizz!

I never really understood before why people liked shopped for clothes over the interwebs - isn't the actual act of shopping all part of the fun? You know, scanning the racks, trying on things that you don't really need and can't really afford, bathing in the insincere compliments of the shop assistants, purchasing the things that you don't need and really can't afford - it is the kind of thing that makes a girl glow all over (and then feel a little ill when she realises just how much she spent and the fact that she doesn't have anything to wear with her new dresses unless she also buys new shoes). But shoppers remorse aside, I would definitely rate shopping as one of my favourite things to do.

Which of course drives my husband crazy. If he wants to spend time with me on the weekend, he can be pretty sure that at least a few hours will be spent sitting in the "husband chair" in front of a change room and alternating between playing Angry Birds on his iPhone and saying nice things to me when I come out so that I don't cry or spend the rest of the day sulking. 

And he is a trouper - he really is - but the boy can only take so much. Apart from making regular cider stops between stores, these expeditions are really not that much fun for him at all. In fact, I think he would rate them as one of his least favourite things to do.

So I came up with a plan - I will start to buy clothes online! That way, he can watch sport or Battlestar Galactica or whatever while I shop and then we can spend our weekends together only doing things that we both like. Like watching horror movies, drinking coffee and talking about how much more awesome our lives would be if we lived in New York (for such a lovely, compatible couple, those are the only things that I can think of that we both like to do...). And with the Australian dollar being strong, and Australian prices being so high, I figured my plan made good fiscal sense too. I am soooooo smart!

So I logged onto (Free international shipping!!!! Alexander Wang!!!! Shoes!!!!), spent hours scanning through all the pretty things, picked a cute Rag & Bone sweater-dress and a couple of knitted jumpers and then - voila! Three days later I was the proud owner of new gear! 

Unfortunately though, while I was waiting for my purchases to arrive, I also became the proud owner of a few other assorted shirts, skirts, dresses and the like that I had bought the old-fashioned way. This was NOT part of the plan.

And since then, I have been on what could only be described as a shopping binge. I have bought things online. I have bought things in my lunch hour. And, worst of all, I have continued to drag my poor husband around from shop to shop on the weekends. All very bad. Of course, it doesn't help that there is a sale on at EVERY SINGLE SHOP in the city at the moment. Really, it isn't my fault when you think about it.

I mean, it isn't like I have been spending stupid amounts of money or anything (I never buy things on my credit card that I don't have the actual money to pay for) but I have got to the stage where I have bought things that I don't really need. I have even been forgetting that I have bought things until I come across them at the bottom of my wardrobe with the tags still on. 

See, the trouble with online shopping is that it denies you the instant gratification that you get from real-life shopping. A couple of clicks and you are done - but with nothing to show for it. Not straight away anyway. So even though it feels like Christmas every time a package arrives for me at work, it did nothing to quell the shopping-monster within me. In fact - it actually seemed to make it hungrier!

The way I see it, there is only one thing to do really - go cold turkey. No more shopping for the rest of this month at least. And after that, I will only buy things I need. Or things that are particularly pretty. Or that are on sale. Or if I am feeling sad. But otherwise - no deal!

I feel better already!


PS - This post looks a little dull with no pictures, doesn't it? Also, it occurs to me that I have really just banged on about my own problems for the whole thing. So, as a reward for those who have stayed reading to the end, here is a picture of Ryan Gosling wearing glasses. YOU'RE WELCOME! 

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